Angela’s Testimony

My name is Angela. I am a University of Zambia law graduate. I never thought I would be telling a story like this.

Two years after graduating from UNZA, while doing my internship at a law firm in Lusaka, I started gambling. Like many people, it began very innocently. Small bets. Curiosity. Something to pass time. Something to feel good after long, exhausting days at work.

I told myself I was in control. I told myself I was smart. I told myself I was a lawyer.

I was wrong.

Before I knew it, I was chasing losses. Every win felt like hope. Every loss felt like something I had to fix immediately. I started borrowing money. First from friends. Then family. Then workmates. I lied. I manipulated. I promised repayments I knew deep down I could not make.

I started doing things that, as a lawyer, I should never have been doing. I gambled continuously for four years. Four long years of fear, shame, panic, and silence. I ruined everything around me. My peace. My integrity. My relationships. My future.

My family lost hope in me. I was once the golden child. The one everyone trusted. The one they were proud of. Now I had become the black sheep. I am the third born out of four. Two brothers and one sister. Before addiction, we were close. We trusted each other with our lives.

After gambling took over, my siblings did not trust me at all. People started going to them asking for their money back. Every phone call they received was another embarrassment connected to my name. Every family gathering felt like a reminder of how far I had fallen. I had borrowed from almost everyone I knew.

Despite being a lawyer, I found myself on the other side of the law. The debt became overwhelming. It was so big that even if I worked on my internship salary without spending a single kwacha, it would take seven years just to clear it. Seven years. That reality crushed me.

I lost hope. There were days I wanted to give up completely. Days I questioned whether my life was worth saving. Days when I felt like my family would be better off without me.

In August 2024, something broke inside me. I asked my family for one last chance. One final chance to try and turn my life around. I admitted that I could not do this on my own. I admitted that gambling had defeated me.

That is when I started my recovery journey with GamAid Zambia. It was not easy. It was uncomfortable. It forced me to face myself.

I started therapy sessions. I did financial counselling. I joined peer support meetings. Sitting in rooms where I had to be honest about my lies, my debt, my shame, and my pain was one of the hardest things I have ever done.

But slowly, things began to change. Over time, the fog started to lift. The panic reduced. The urge to gamble became quieter. I started learning how to sit with discomfort instead of running from it. I started understanding my triggers. I started rebuilding discipline, honesty, and self respect.

Today, over a year later, choosing recovery is the best decision I have ever made. After four years in addiction and now one year clean from gambling, I am finally starting to get my life back. I am proud of myself. Not because everything is perfect, but because I did not give up.

I am now enrolled in ZIALE and I am working towards admission to the Zambian Bar. For the first time in years, I am looking at the future with hope instead of fear. I am rebuilding my relationship with my siblings, one honest conversation at a time. Trust is not fully restored yet, but I am patient. I understand that healing takes time.

Through financial counselling, I now have a realistic debt repayment plan. The debt did not disappear, but I no longer feel paralysed by it. I have a plan. I have support. I have hope. Gambling addiction took almost everything from me. My dignity. My relationships. My career. My peace.

Recovery gave me something back. My life.

If you are reading this and you feel seen, please know this. Help exists. Recovery is possible. And no matter how far you think you have fallen, you are not beyond saving.